


Silent Partners

by AnonEhouse



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Captain America: Civil War Trailer, Crack Treated Seriously, Fix-It, Gen, Gen or Pre-Slash, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-12
Updated: 2016-03-12
Packaged: 2018-05-26 08:32:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6231628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonEhouse/pseuds/AnonEhouse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint doesn't like to say anything, but then, he's never needed words with Natasha. Neither of them like this Civil War, but what can they do? They've chosen their sides.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Silent Partners

(If you are reading this on any PAY site this is a STOLEN WORK, the author has NOT Given Permission for it to be here. If you're paying to read it, you're being cheated too because you can read it on Archiveofourown for FREE.)

 

 

Clint stared across the tarmac at 'Tasha, eyes meeting before he remembered that they were enemies and he shouldn't. He dropped his gaze to her hands, which was where the danger always lay. Until the shouting match between Steve and Tony ended, there was nothing to do but wait.

 _R U OK?_ , she signed to him in the private language they'd developed over the years.

 _Yes_ He hated being on the other team, but he empathized with Bucky's screwed up mind so that was where he belonged. 'Tasha could understand Bucky too, if she let herself, but she couldn't afford to look too deep into her past. _Cap's sad_

_Tony's a mess_

_Same old, same old_ , Clint signed, trying for levity he didn't feel. _UST_ , he spelled instead of the more explicit signal they normally used. It would be a little difficult to explain if Captain Language saw.

_Yes. Reed agrees._

_Gadget worked?_

_Yes. Showed me the answer. Resolve UST_

Clint really doubted that. Yeah, blue ball syndrome was undoubtedly part of the reason for the lack of thought going on with both of their leaders, but he didn't think getting them laid would solve the underlying conflict. Then again, he hadn't any better ideas. _Pepper? Sharon?_

'Tasha used the signal that meant 'idiot'. _Each other_

 _R U sure_

_Tony's pan. Steve's gay_

Yeah, ok, Clint had guessed that about Tony, and 'Tasha had told him about her many failed hook-ups for Steve before he began an on-again, off-again relationship with Sharon which didn't sound like the romance of the ages, but you know, just because someone is the right category doesn't mean there's attraction. He always thought punching hell out of someone meant you didn't like them. Before he could decide how to answer her, 'Tasha was signing again.

_Steve and Tony marry. World saved. Reed says._

Since when did 'Tasha take Reed Richard's word for anything? That interdimensional viewing thing must have been really convincing. He shrugged mentally. _Ok. How?_ He was fairly sure locking Tony and Steve in a closet together was impractical.

 _Have plan_ she signed, and then the yelling stopped, and Cap started running. So, whatever, Clint and the rest of Steve's ducklings ran after him, or flew, whatever, to meet Tony's oncoming small horde. Clint hoped that they didn't look as stupid as he felt. Maybe he should yell 'This is Sparta'. He also hoped 'Tasha's plan, whatever it was, worked.

There was a loud engine roar. Clint ducked along with everyone else as a smallish jet flew directly overhead to smash into the tarmac in the middle of the largest runway. The left wing hit first and it tumbled with flames flowering from the broken wing. Clint turned towards it without thinking, and found himself running side by side with 'Tasha along with everyone else, intent on rescue and totally forgetting they were ready to kill each other a few seconds ago. 'Tasha's mouth quirked up slightly, but he didn't have enough time to figure out why she was smirking.

The plane shuddered. Clint thought, 'That's weird', and then the side of the fuselage burst open, but it wasn't an explosion. Oh, no, it was much worse than that.

Hulk stepped out of the plane, growling with aluminum draped over his shoulders like a shawl. He tore the metal off and strode forward. He glanced at 'Tasha and raised one green eyebrow. 'Tasha smirked even wider.

"This? This was your plan?" Clint threw his hands up in the air. He was the center of attention for a second, and then Hulk jumped past him to snag Iron Man out of the air and tuck him under one arm despite his struggles and protests.

"Hey!" Steve shouted. He threw his shield at Hulk, who batted it down and stomped towards him, ignoring everyone else.

Clint couldn't figure out whether Steve was angry because Hulk had taken the fight away from him, or whether he was worried about Tony. UST. It messes up a person's mind.

Hulk stared at Steve who stared back. Hulk grunted and dropped Iron Man in front of him. He grabbed Steve around the neck. "NOW KISS!" he roared.

"What?" Steve asked, dazed.

Iron Man's repulsors whined. Hulk narrowed his eyes. "MAKE LOVE, NOT WAR!" He grabbed Iron Man's faceplate and ripped it off, throwing it in the direction he'd sent Cap's shield. It bounced a few times like a stone skipping on a lake before coming to rest on the shield. Hulk grabbed Iron Man's neck and shoved him at Steve. "HULK TIRED OF THIS BS! KISS!"

Clint looked at 'Tasha. She shrugged.

"I'm not going to kiss him!" Steve said. 

"Yeah, yeah," Tony replied. "Lips that touch liquor shall never touch mine, right?"

"What's that got to do with anything?" Steve yelled back.

"Hell if I know!" Tony waved his arms. "I try and I try and I'm never good enough for you!"

"That's not it. That was never it, Tony!" Steve grabbed Tony's arms to hold him still. "We need to talk. Really talk."

"Yeah. Maybe." Tony stared at Steve. "You really do have the most amazing azure eyes, you know, Steve?"

There were more than a few gagging noises from both teams. Hulk rolled his eyes and let go of Steve and Tony, who continued gazing into each others' eyes and being all emo. He wandered over to 'Tasha. "HULK NOT READY TO GO STEADY," he announced. "BUT STILL LIKE YOU."

'Tasha patted Hulk's arm. "My hero."

Hulk grinned. 

"Hey!" What about me?" came an unfamiliar voice. It sounded like a teenager.

Clint looked up to see a skinny guy in red and blue spandex, swinging from a weird-looking line. "You wanna be a hero, kid?"

"With great power comes great responsibility," the kid replied seriously, while hanging upside down from his rope like a piñata.

Clint glanced around. Captain America and Iron Man were lip-locked. Hulk and 'Tasha were holding hands. The Scarlet Witch and Vision were... well, it was sweet, but kinky the way they were using colored light powers on each other... and... you know, Clint really didn't need to see everyone getting their cuddle on in public. "Fine, kid. You get to write the mission report. That'll make you my hero."

It was early yet. Clint could hit the range and get in some target practice. It didn't have to be a wasted day. He signed, _U got this?_ to 'Tasha. 

She flipped him off, which he took for a 'yes', and left before Ant Man could put the moves on him.

**Author's Note:**

> (Just saw the second Civil War trailer. Need to get in this fix-it, before the real thing happens & I need to come up with OTHER fix its.) Gleefully mixed in bits of comics canon and fanon here, but the characters are all MCU.
> 
> UST = Unresolved Sexual Tension (in case you didn't know the acronym. I wouldn't want you to look it up on TV Tropes and be lost forever.)


End file.
